A. Attention Getter
Have you ever had an experience that shakes you to the core, and you just dont know how to deal or live with the consequences? How do you wake up to welcome a new day when your only brother is brutally killed, never to hear his voice again? Never to visit the popular joints you used to visit fondly, the dreams you shared shattered, the unbearable pain in his friends heart
B. Thesis Statement
Mixed emotion is a feeling that cannot be described, losing someone, losing someone close to you is an unbearable pain and wondering if you will ever get through life is ludicrous. At times, you just wish you would both die.
II. Body Paragraph 1
On November 18th, 2015 I woke up to see several missed calls from my family members. Since my phone was in a silent mode, I could not have heard it ringing.
A. This made me curious and I called them back only to discover that my brother was killed November 17th at 9:30 pm on his way to my fathers birthday party.
B. This was the worst day of my life and I did not know what to do. That was the worst day I had ever experienced in my life and I did not know what to do or what to say, all I could do was to panic wishing that the world could come to an end.
C. I had so many unanswered questions in my mind all I knew from the polices report was that two black trucks approached him on his way home and was shot fired several times. This marked the beginning of a long, torturous moment of my life.
D. I kept checking my phone every time someone called, getting disappointed each time I see his name from my call history, I question why and how it is almost unbelievable when you were just with a person 48 hours ago and now he is gone forever.
E. My hope of seeing every minute pass kept on dwindling, I felt like I had a bad luck and nothing in the world could make me smile again.
F. My world broke loose and everything seemed upside down and I was trying to figure out how I could ever get my life back on the track. Uncontrollable sobs shook me. I felt the deepest pain I never imagined existed. My big brother couldnt be gone; I kept telling myself, despite knowing the reality that he was already gone.
III Body paragraph 2
The following day we organized for a hearse, and we took his body home for burial. The question in my mind was how to prepare myself for the funeral. I wanted to mourn the loss of my only brother but I had been strong by preparing myself the best way.
A. I was not prepared for any such eventuality because I never imagined such a thing would happen and this made me afraid to see him because I thought he was not going to have the same look he had before he died.
B. He was shot 10-15 times in the car. His face was intact though his head was half blown probably by the bullet which went through it.
C. What made my heart smile for the first time is that he looked like his exact self.
D. As I was still creating the images of my brother in my mind, I heard my-my 10-year-old niece say DaDa referring to her dad (my dead brother). This made me sad knowing that the little never in her life see her dad again.
E. The final body viewing was the hardest part for as I knew this was the last time I would ever set my eyes on my brother, not tomorrow and not forever.
F. It was even worse for me when the casket was closed, it felt like my heart was falling out of my chest. I allowed every restraint go and cried it all out.
IV. Body Paragraph 3
A. After the funeral, the crowd at home diminished, people settled back to their routines. It became harder and worse facing reality.
B. Going back to work and trying to finish my semester proved to be so challenging but I chose to assimilate every pain into my system, never sharing with anyone because I never believed anyone would understand the pain I was going through; so why bother telling them about it anyway?
C. Adapting to live after losing a loved one is heartbreaking, it is when I am alone that it gets worse because there is nothing to distract me from his memories, no matter how hard I try.
D. Spending time with my friends helped in some way not to think about the loss and the void in my heart. Though at times, you feel like you are being a bother to them.
E. Some days memories of the good times would flood back like a massive wave, and Id lose all control and just sob.
F. Sometimes it is hard to smile but I just had to be strong for myself and accept the hard reality.
V. Body Paragraph 4
A. Just when I had started learning how to deal with my brothers death my second mother (my grandma) who had raised me passed away.
B. My grandmother had a stroke and she was rushed to the hospital where the doctor stated that there was blood blockage in her neck.
C. Since it was her wish not to be put in life support, my grandmother was taken off life support. The life in her actively faded for 8 days.
D. She passed on December 29th, 2015.
I thought I couldnt sustain anymore; too much tragedy for a frail heart. But it is under such tragedies that you get to know truly how strong you can be. You get to know that each moment you spend with someone is precious, and it should be savored with all might because you never know when you will again have such a moment with the ones you love. You learn and accept the bitter truth that at some point in our lives we will lose people we love and the only wise thing to do is to accept such apparently impossible realities.
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